
Unfortunately, they have me over one point. I had heard the Schickele spoof symphony before I ever listened to Brahms's 2nd. And Schickele's Unbegun Symphony begins with the opening passage of the Brahms 2nd Symphony, wittily combined with "Beautiful Dreamer" and "Ta Ra Ra Boom De Ay." For years afterward, I was unable to hear this passage from Brahms without snickering at the possibility of "Ta Ra Ra Boom De Ay" breaking out, instead of the sweet violin theme Brahms introduces in bar 44. I'm better now, but this does say something about the foolishness of learning a joke before you know why it's funny.
All right, enough true confessions. Let's talk turkey.

The staves in my miniature score are labeled in German, the way Brahms originally wrote them. From top to bottom, the staves are laid out in the customary order, with the woodwinds on top, followed by French horns, brass instruments, and timpani, all braced together; and below them, enclosed by a separate brace, the strings. Don't be impertinent about the fourth staff (2 Fagotte). This is not a reference to a same-sex couple, but to a pair of bassoons. You'll notice that each staff, string parts excepted, is shared by two instruments; and some of the instruments appear to be playing in a different key from everybody else - long story short, when a "Clarinet in A" plays a written C, you hear an A. There's a similar story to do with the horns (in D and E), and the trumpets (in D); everything these instruments play has to be transposed into another key. Which just adds another reason to admire the people who read and write such scores professionally. They really have to keep track of a lot of things at once.

Of course, that's just one more thing - in addition to the sheer number of staves, the wide-spread notes, and the transposing instruments - preventing average people like the guy across the hall, or even slightly above-average people like you, from sitting down at the piano and playing Brahms's 2nd Symphony out of the open score. This is why they also make piano-reductions of them. The ones for two hands are either fiendishly difficult or simplified out of any semblance to the original work; the ones for four hands, however, require...well, four hands. Each two-page spread has a left-hand page for the "Secondo" player (who owns the bottom of the keyboard) and a right-hand page for the "Primo" player (who owns the top), so they can share a book and a piano bench and, hopefully, not elbow each other to death while trying to play their respective parts.
One last thing to point out, for anyone daring enough to be following along in a miniature score: notice the 1st and 2nd Violin parts, and Viola, in bar 2, right after the repeat sign. Each part has one note followed by two quarter-rests, with a notation saying "2. Mal." This means "the second time." So, these notes are properly part of the "first ending" at the end of the Exposition, where it goes back to the beginning of the movement. Ignore them for now.

After this theme is fully stated, the woodwinds and violins take it over and build up to the first passage of sustained intensity in the movement so far. Throughout this passage Brahms develops a four-note figure, then goes back to the cello theme for the gentle end of the exposition. The development shows Brahms messing around with the opening motifs, weaving daisy-chains of one bit and inventing a grisly fugato from another, complete with a brass stretto that sounds like either a violent collision or a violent separation. The fury builds - still based on fragments of the movement's opening - until the theme from bar 44 comes back and momentarily restores some peace. Then comes another scary explosion, based on the opening horn phrase, but the bar 44 theme again settles things down for what seems to be a varied recap of the movement's opening. The main difference seems to be the addition of a quiet, restless motion in the background. All the themes are where they belong, only closer to the home key of D. But the movement has only made it as far back as A major (the dominant) by the end of the recap. This leaves the coda to bring us the rest of the way home, while many of the movement's themes step forward for a parting bow.

Movement III, roughly in ABABA form, begins as a lilting, dancelike Allegretto in G major, scored mostly for winds. Then the strings suddenly sweep the piece off in a furious rush, a contrasting section in which I always thought I heard something like the lilting tune flipped upside down (though Brahms never quite does this). The transition back to the opening material is much more gradual and graceful, but the strings break off a piece of the theme to create an ostinato passage of almost tragic seriousness. The rapid episode comes back again, only in a triple metre this time, a twist that leads to some memorable rhythmic surprises. Finally the opening subject comes back for a full orchestral treatment that brings the movement to a touching close.

Brahms alters the transition to the second group (omitting the transition material from the exposition section). The codetta veers off into unexpected harmonic territory, opening the door to a long coda in which the themes come back for a bit more development. The first theme gets some of the same tranquility-treatment it got at the end of the development, but this time instead of growing tranquil it grows bigger and louder and more ecstatic. Just when Brahms seems to have lost his grip and let the piece run wild, the chorale-like second theme comes back - for once, not slowly, but in the form of a boisterous brass fanfare, followed by 9 bars of colossal closing chords with nary a hint of ritard.
IMAGES: Peter Schickele; a Dover Miniature Score; Johannes Brahms; a violoncello; clarinets and bassoons; a trumpet and violin. EDIT: Here is a video of Herbert von Karajan and the Berlin Philharmonic performing the finale of Brahms's Second:
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