The Thingummies of Springtime

On Holy Saturday and Easter Sunday, I used a Walgreens disposable camera to shoot snaps of some of God's wonderful works of art. And here they are, even though I don't know what their names are.

Please help me identify these lovely flowers. Most of them smell at least as good as they look, and all of them look better in person than on film - at least as taken by this untalented amateur with a throw-away snap camera and 400-speed film.

I noticed a lot of trees like this during one of my long walks last weekend. What particularly struck me about them was their slightly yucky smell, with subtle undertones of Sparky the Seal's tank at the zoo. I actually walked into a florist's shop within sight of one of these trees, pointed it out, and asked what it was - and a shopful of flower-arranging professionals couldn't tell me. "What do we look like, herbalists?" So, until I am given more accurate information, I shall dub this species the Stinky Tree.

Here are some of the Stinky Tree's blossoms, a bit closer up.

Here is a lovely thing I snapped at church on Sunday morning. I think I know what it is, but I'm afraid to make myself look like an even stupider fat-stupid-jerk. One mustn't upset the balance between fat and stupid! So, for now, I dub this flower the Red Thingummy. Feel free to correct my nomenclature.

Here, for comparison purposes, is a picture of several Red Thingummies together.

Now, I have it on good authority that these gorgeous, scentacular numbers are magnolias. For a couple of weeks there was a whole huge tree of them outside the parlor at my church, but by the time I caught them on film, they were nearly gone. I'm glad I didn't miss them altogether!

On the other hand, I'm not sure whether this is a magnolia tree or not. I spotted it near my apartment, but I can't say whether it's a different breed of the same thing, or a different thing altogether. Do you know?

These gold thingummies grow on bushes scattered among the buildings of my apartment complex. They were blooming like crazy on April 3, but already on the 4th (when I took this picture) it was getting hard to find a bush in full blossom. The flowers have an interesting melted look, like wax sculptures that have been allowed to get just a bit too warm.

These yellow thingummies have been popping up all over the place, both by my apartment building and by my church.

Here are some more yellow thingummies, with some of their white-thingummy cousins.

Boy, did this picture turn out badly. Maybe you can still tell what these blue thingummies are. They were also at church. And I think I saw some of them freeze to death in a dementor flyby in one of the Harry Potter movies. So maybe there's something Scottish about them. Like, maybe, Scottish Blue Bells of Despair. You tell me!

These cute little scarlet-and-white dingusses (dingi?) look a little bit like a string of gay-plumed game birds that have all been shot on the opening day of hunting season.

Here are multiple varieties of thingummies growing in close proximity. Nice, eh!

Whatever these pink doohickeys are, they have somewhat of the aspect of a pile of soap shavings left over after an attempted jailbreak involving a gun carved out of Lifebuoy. I hope they remembered to put bootblack on it, though, because a pink gun isn't going to fool anybody. Those cons could end up buried under flowers like this!

Scottish Blue Dingi of Death again. I would take a picture of today's special outside my front window - a tree whose limbs are completely furred with little rosy flowers - but I'm out of film. Alas. But I hope you enjoyed my display of Easter thingummies. And, if you have any constructive suggestions as to how better to name them, do leave a comment. Happy Easter!