592. Prayer for Mistreated Ministers

For my friend and brother, Alan Kornacki Jr. Art: Window in the Apse of St. Ignatius Church, Chestnut Hill, Mass., photograph by John P. Workman, Jr., licensed under the GNU Free Documentation License. Tune: LOB SEI DEM ALLMÄCHTIGEN GOTT by Johann Crüger, †1662, the tune to "Great God, a blessing from your throne" in Lutheran Book of Worship, "Not always on the mount may we" and "O Paschal Feast, what joy is thine" in Service Book and Hymnal. Or whatever.

Remember, God, Your children's need!
Stand watch, we pray, upon Your seed:
Your living and abiding word,
At work where it is preached and heard.

Uphold, dear Christ, the men You call
To speak Your truth to one and all.
Through their reproof our steps correct;
Put what they promise to effect.

Look, Lord! How Satan sows his tares
And sets out stumbling blocks and snares
To hinder, if he can, the feet
That carry news of comfort sweet!

Look how this age's tyrant tries
To curb Your word, preferring lies,
And what devices he has brought
To set Your servants' work at naught!

Look how false brethren daily rise
To do what seems right in their eyes;
How some, who churchly power claim,
Betray those branded with Your name!

Before their strength is fully spent,
Bid every help to them be sent;
Let even us, with spirit bold,
Mistreated ministers uphold.

For if no trusty heralds go,
Lord, how can we Your tidings know?
Inhale the prayers the faithful burn,
The incense of our heart's concern!

The Devil Wears Prada 2

Did I see The Devil Wears Prada 2? You betcha. On Thursday night, when it debuted in my small town's local theater. I had seen the original, of course. All of 20 years ago! The year before I started this blog! So I have no record of what I thought of the first movie at the time, but I remember it well enough. You see, I was working for a magazine back then. In fact, I was the executive assistant to the editor. I was basically a guy version of Andrea "Andy" Sachs, except I was nowhere near New York. (That was the year I first visited the city, though.) And it wasn't a fashion magazine.

As for my then-boss ... well, it wouldn't be politic to say much about that, except that he is also a guy, and not a fashion maven by any stretch. But I got a lot of what Andy was struggling with, and I learned a lot of the lessons she had to learn. It gave a certain kick to my viewing experience. And then, I guess also like Andy, I moved on from the magazine job to other things and eventually ended up as a journalist. Even, if I may say it, an award-winning one; though again not on anything like the level we find Andy working at in the early scenes of this film. I'm still writing for a newspaper, in fact. I haven't been cashiered out. The company I work for did lay off a few folks during some lean times, but most of us are still working. But yeah, I am also acutely aware of the predicament that print media and independent journalism are in. Our industry is changing. It's going digital first and, for some outlets, digital only. The perception that a newspaper career is a thing of the past holds the kind of currency that, when I was catching up with some cousins at a family funeral a couple years ago and I told them what I do, they scoffed: "How do you still have a job?" Screw you very much, guys.

So, in this 20-years-later follow-up to what might be Meryl Streep's most popular role – Runway editor Miranda Priestly – her ex-assistant Andrea comes back, played again by Anne Hathaway. Andy was actually moments away from accepting a major journalism award when she and her entire editorial team got sacked, via text. But Runway isn't faring much better. Now an online-only magazine, it struggles with public credibility. So the publisher brings on Andy as the new features editor in a last-ditch attempt to right the ship. Of course Miranda is as unsupportive as she could possibly be, but Andy gradually proves herself and works her way into her boss's confidence, only to see one new crisis after another emerge as a new owner, and potentially another one after that, threatens everything they have built.

Synopsis aside, it's a fun adventure among the jealousies, snobberies and treacheries of the fashion world. There are plots within plots, and Andy really doesn't earn Miranda's confidence until she hatches one of her own. There are delicious surprises and moments of pure cringe. The deeper Andy gets in the fashion world, the more whatever she wears looks stunning. (Whereas a lot of the high fashion displayed in the movie's magazine shoots actually comes across as ridiculous.) There are some brilliant lines (One of my favorites is "Bridges that I have burned, light my way"). Even after a good 20 years of experience doing serious journalism, Andy still has a lot to learn about figuring out what her job is and how to do it. And the film doesn't fully commit to painting Miranda as the devil; it softens her, or softens toward her, I think even earlier than the first movie did. Nevertheless, Streep still has it, and Hathaway does too.

Stanley Tucci, although noticeably older now, still plays Miranda's faithful doormat, a fashion director who has been passed over for promotion too many times to count and now steers a tricky course between being a warm mentor to Andy and a ruthlessly unsympathetic reality check: "Ah, poor girl! She actually has to work things out for herself!" Emily Blunt is back as another former assistant to Miranda who has gone full Cruella deVil, working in the luxury retail industry. Kenneth Branagh puts in a turn as Miranda's husband. Lucy Liu and Justin Theroux play a super-rich ex-couple – his half being hands-down the most obnoxious person in the movie. B.J. Novak of The Office and Lady Gaga (as herself) are also in it.

Three Scenes That Made It For Me: (1) After Emily makes a catty remark about her eyebrows, Andy looks anxiously in the mirror, then snorts: "They're just eyebrows." (2) The new publisher summons Miranda to a lunch date in the cafeteria, it is suddenly apparent that she didn't even know the building had one; she's never even been on that floor. (3) Miranda is always being restrained by her current executive assistant from saying the kinds of things that H.R. frowns upon these days, but can't help letting little enormities slip out – like the line, in criticism of a story pitched by one of her editorial team, "May my suicide be quick and painless." Then, catching her assistant's hairy eyeball: "What? At least I didn't threaten to kill someone else."

The Chosen, Seasons 1-4

Someone at my church loaned me the DVD set for Season 1 of this show, which dramatizes the gospels of Jesus Christ, and I enjoyed it so much that I went looking for more of it on disc. I saw a five-season boxed set available online for more money than I wanted to pay, but then I glanced at a shelf at Walmart and there were seasons 1-4 for considerably less. So I got the set and binge-watched Seasons 2-4, and this is what I think about it.

First, the show has a great cast, plays out on beautiful locations and has terrific production values. When it's hits, it hits hard, with big-picture faithfulness to the biblical witness and emotional beats that left me sobbing more than once. It also, unfortunately, embellishes the canonical story with fictional scenes that, I suppose, are intended to fill in gaps in the story and carry forward the parallel stories of Jesus, his followers and their families, the Roman authorities, and various Jewish people ranging from ambivalent supporters to deadly enemies of Jesus. Some of these extra scenes, more and more as the series goes on, feel to me like unnecessary padding and is sometimes downright dull, whereas the parts that emotionally grabbed me were pretty much all biblical material.

I gather this show started with a pilot that the creator, Dallas Jenkins, made as a video for his church, and the series developed from there, all crowd-funded. In a message Jenkins inserted into the Season 1 video set, he says he planned the show to get through Jesus' entire ministry, death and resurrection in eight seasons, but I think it's been trimmed down to seven seasons since then; five have been filmed so far.

The pilot, "The Shepherd," is a version of the Christmas story according to Luke 2, from the point of view of a lame shepherd who (in the film, not the gospel) is miraculously healed when the angels announce the Messiah's birth. I'd like it more if you actually saw and/or heard the angels' announcement. But you see a good deal of the potential for the series in this brief film.

Season 1 covers Jesus' ministry from healing the demon-possessed woman we will know as Mary Magdalene to Jesus' encounter with the woman at Jacob's well in Samaria. A broad thread running through this season's eight episodes is the Pharisee Nicodemus' recognition that Jesus is the Christ, which pays off with some of those powerful emotional moments I mentioned before. It also shows part of the process of Jesus' calling his 12 disciples, starting (when we first meet him) with "Little James" and Thaddeus, then collecting Andrew, Peter, "Big James" and John as well as Matthew the tax collector. It depicts some of Jesus' early, non-public miracles, such as healing Mary and filling the fishermen's nets, then moves on to his public miracles like changing water to wine at Cana (making a disciple of Thomas, a wine merchant) and healing the paralytic let down through the roof of Zebedee's house. It gives us Jesus' rooftop conference with Nicodemus (John 3), with his "For God so loved the world" statement and discussion of being born again, and he finally heals Simon (Peter)'s mother-in-law before leading his first half-dozen disciples to Samaria.

Like I said, the whole Nicodemus plot line sent me into fits of tears. Erick Avari, whom you may recall from such movies as Stargate, delivers a powerhouse performance as a man torn between following Jesus and remaining rooted in his scholarly position. Other cast members you may recognize are Yasmine Al-Bustami of NCIS: Hawai'i as Ramah, Thomas' woman friend and later fiance, Kirk B.R. Woller as Roman Centurion Gaius, Brandon Potter as the Roman praetor of Capernaum and Jonathan Roumie as Jesus, an actor I first spotted in Solo Mio; he also played an evangelist in Jesus Revolution.

In Season 2, Big James and John get their nickname "Sons of Thunder" when they ask Jesus to destroy some hostile Samaritans. Moving on from Samaria to Syria, Jesus makes disciples of Philip and Nathanael – the latter in another one of the scenes that gets me choked up. Conflict simmers between the disciples, particularly between Simon Peter and Matthew, whose background as a tax collector he particularly resents. In Jerusalem, Jesus heals another paralytic, the one who has spent years waiting for a chance to crawl into the Pool of Bethesda when its waters are stirred, and this gets the attention of Simon the Zealot, known as "Z" in this series and depicted as the second paralytic's estranged brother. Z, kind of a kung-fu disciple, follows Jesus and appoints himself as security chief.

Meanwhile, as I mentioned, a lot's going on among the Pharisees, with a couple of them investigating Jesus' activities and looking for a pretext to file charges against him. Their attitude in general seems to be to take offense at everything. I don't remmeber if it's in this season or not, but at one point a Hellenized Jew shows up at the temple to inform on Jesus and before he can get five words out of his mouth, the Pharisee questioning him gives him the what-for for wearing damask, a blended fabric, which isn't kosher. These stooges catch up with Jesus as he and his disciples are coming away from a big sermon and various miracles, and when one of them takes that hoity-toity tone with one of the witnesses, he shames them with a statement like, "He's healing us, and you're just tearing us down" – a moment that creates a spiritual crisis for one of the Pharisees, in what may be the most emotionally powerful non-canonical moment in the series.

Season 2 wraps up with preparations for Jesus' Sermon on the Mount, an occasion that brings Judas Iscariot into his circle. Season 3 introduces us to Jairus, a sympathetic synagogue offical whose daughter Jesus will eventually raise from the dead. Jesus sends the disciples out on a mission trip, two by two; he preaches at the synagogue in his hometown and is violently rejected by the townsfolk; he heals Veronica, the woman with a discharge of blood; he responsds to questioning by John the Baptist's disciples, offending the Pharisees once more; he heals a deaf-mute man; and he concludes the season by feeding the 5,000.

Season 4 depicts the birth and death of John the Baptist, with Paul Ben-Victor (Entourage, The Invisible Man) playing Herod. Simon confesses Jesus is the Christ and receives the name Peter. Richard Fancy, Elaine's boss on Seinfeld, appears as Caiaphas the high priest. Matthew and Peter are reconciled. Jesus heals the man born blind, but when the local praetor goes spare during a small-scale riot and stabs Ramah, Jesus doesn't heal her; her death becomes a sore point with Thomas. Jesus begins foretelling his death, and he heals the new praetor's (previously a centurion) son. Judas starts pilfering from the disciples' funds. After visiting Lazarus, Mary and Martha at Bethany, the group barely escapes being stoned in Jerusalem. They travel back to Bethany for Jesus to raise Lazarus from the dead, further upsetting Thomas. Mary of Bethany anoints Jesus' feet with costly perfume, which causes a Pharisee who earlier started sympathizing with Jesus to break with him and hardens Judas' resolve to betray him; and with a bit of preparation, Jesus enters Jerusalem riding on a donkey.

So far, season 1-4 of The Chosen. I've left out an awful lot, but this is enough of a synopsis to give you an idea of how the show is progressing. It looks like Season 5 stretches out Passion Week from Jesus' entry into Jerusalem on Sunday to his arrest in the garden on Thursday across eight episodes, which further suggests that Season 6 will be eight hours of Jesus' being tried, crucified and buried and Season 7 will cover from his resurrection to his ascension.

Whether or not it turns out that way, I have no complaints about the show except that, increasingly as it progresses, the plot drags as supplementary material is added to the biblically witnessed teachings and works of Jesus. My complaint isn't that it's doctrinally incorrect or tonally out of whack, just that it gets a little boring when it isn't laser-focused on what Jesus did and said – for when that focus is there, it's dynamite. Nicodemus' tears as he hid around the corner, at the end of Season 1, declining to follow Jesus on his travels, and the way Shmuel the Pharisee's world drops out from beneath his feet when Leander (I think that's his name) rebukes him for tearing down when Jesus is building up, are two exceptions – cases when something the show reads into the narrative hit hard. There's so much biblical material and I think focusing on that would be more to the show's advantage when it's actually the most gripping stuff.

Three Things That Made It For Me, as a TV dramatization: (1) Matthew being depicted as more or less Charlie Eppes from Numb3rs, with some additional OCD tics and possible signs of being on the autism spectrum; his characterization is a highlight of this fictionalization, with character growth as he breaks with his Roman protector, reconciles with his estranged parents, reconnects with his faith and becomes an evangelist. (2) John, also an evangelist, depicted as working out the opening of his gospel while sitting shiva for his brother, Big James. (3) Little James, depicted as suffering from a partial paralysis that Jesus never heals, and learning to bear this affliction faithfully despite the evidence all around him that he could indeed be healed. Yeah, yeah, there's a love story between Simon and his wife, and there's all the drama surrounding Thomas and Ramah, and of course I love the Nicodemus storyline in Season 1, and Z asking after Simon becomes Peter if that means he can have his name back and everybody in unison answering, "No," is legit hilarious; these are touches that show that faithfulness and a vivid imagination need not be kept apart. But sometimes the faithfulness is moving in and of itself.

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds, Season 3

I was there when Happy Days jumped the shark. A little grade-school kid watching from a parsonage living room in Nebraska, via a signal captured by an aerial antenna that could be disrupted by as little as an air popper making popcorn in the next room – I almost said a microwave oven, but we didn't have one of those until the next parsonage – and when my little brother and I hung on everything the Fonz did. And later, the Duke boys and the Knight Rider. If you get what I'm saying, you know what kind of boys we were. But even we weren't so oblivious that we didn't recognize, when the Fonz literally jumped a shark (on water skis), what kind of proverb was in the making. And now I have lived to see a Star Trek series that I thought was very promising, in the first season or two, jumping so many sharks it was like skipping rocks. It could be argued that the selachid vaulting started in earnest with the penultimate episode of S2, "Subspace Rhapsody," where technobabble turned the Enterprise crew into the cast of a musical revue with plot and character points underscored by song and dance numbers.

And yet the show goes on, and the jumping of sharks continues regularly throughout this third season, and there are still two seasons of this series to come. Considered alongside the direction Picard and Discovery took in their final seasons, and the notoriously bad Star Trek: Section 31 TV movie, and the dismal failure of Star Trek: Starfleet Academy in one season flat (though a second season is still being produced at exorbitant expense), this almost suggests that somebody hates Star Trek with a holy passion and is purposefully augering it into the ground. Exhibits follow.

The season opens with "Hegemony, Part II," concluding the cliffhanger from the end of Season 2, in which several principal characters and a whole bunch of colonists were taken prisoner by the Gorn. This is actually one of the season's stronger episodes, with the Enterprises skirting the edge of violating a treaty with the Gorn to rescue the captives, while back in sickbay, Capt. Pike's girlfriend, Capt. Batel, receives an infusion of Number One's genetically modified Illyrian blood to help her combat the growth of Gorn eggs inside her body. This sets up a story arc that continues throughout the season.

"Wedding Bell Blues" features Rhys Darby of Flight of the Conchords as a version of the original series' capricious god-child, Trelane ("The Squire of Gothos"), and a voice cameo by John de Lancie suggesting that he might be a Q. It also introduces Cillian O'Sullivan as Roger Korby (TOS's "What Are Little Girls Made Of?") as Christine Chapel's new squeeze, a medical archaeologist. In this adventure, which definitely revs the speed boat engine if not actually jumping a shark, Spock is the first person who notices when Trelane, disguised as a bartender, changes reality to allow him and Christine to be a couple, then gets mad (like, threatening-people's-lives mad) when Spock and later others resist being played with like toys. It's kind of a fun episode, but it sets a pattern for this season of tampering with the show's characters, tone and genre every second or third episode – the kind of thing that can be a highlight of a season when it happens once every 26 episodes, but that destroys series continuity when it happens three or four times out of 10.

"Shuttle to Kenfori" is a "Star Trek does The Evil Dead" episode, in which Pike and M'Benga encounter zombies, basically, while searching an abandoned science lab for a flower that is supposed to help Batel with her Gorn problem. Of course the zombie outbreak has something to do with the flower, which does some kind of genetic jiggery-pokery, which rather paints M'Benga as a bit of a mad scientist and also, thanks to a Klingon character who hunts him down for revenge, reveals that he really did murder that Klingon ambassador in S2. He's a really morally compromised dude, and as Dr. Bashir's Little Sickbay or Horrors in DS9 so frequently demonstrates, the cure can be worse than the disease.

"A Space Adventure Hour" hits the ramp so hard that the water skier escapes from orbit, with La'An trying out a prototype of what (in the TNG era) will become standard equipment on a long-range starship: the holodeck. Why isn't it a thing before then? Behold: in trying to solve a pulp mystery, La'An gets stuck in the holodeck with no exit and no safety protocols. Meanwhile, characters in the whodunit wear faces of Star Trek principals, playing an over-the-top parody of TOS cast members and creatives. It's a surprisingly on-the-nose and not very kind parody of original Trek.

"Through the Lens of Time" is another horror episode, in which a young nurse named Gamble (recurring throughout the previous episodes of the season) takes it on the chin in a truly ghastly way while other characters, including Korby and Ortegas' younger, documentary filmmaker brother Beto, become trapped in what at first seems like an ancient, alien temple, but that might actually be something much more dangerous. Just thinking of Gamble getting his eyeballs fried out, then walking and talking like a living man even after his life signs cease, gives me the heebie-jeebies the way certain episodes of Doctor Who did. (Remember the one where you had to check whether somebody had a shadow or not?)

"The Sehlat Who Ate Its Tail" finds Lt. James Kirk thrust into his first command when the U.S.S. Farragut gets attacked by a huge vessel that has the terrifying ability to open its jaws and, like, eat the Enterprise. Like, "Star Trek meets Mortal Engines." Assisted by some Enterprises who had beamed across to help before the chomp went down, Kirk struggles to find his footing in this crisis, but maybe the most memorable thing about the episode is who the scavengers turn out to be. It's kind of disturbing.

"What Is Starfleet?" is Beto's documentary, which at first seems very negative about the space force his sister serves in. It doesn't help Starfleet's optics that the Enterprise has been conned into assisting some alien scientists in what turns out to be an act of aggression against a neighboring planet and, also, involves the enslavement of a magnificent space creature. The remarkable thing about this episode is how much deleted material is preserved on the DVD; it could have been a feature-length installment.

"Four-and-a-Half Vulcans" is the episode teased before Season 3 debuted, in which Pike, Uhura, Chapel and La'An take a modified version of the alien serum that restored Spock's Vulcan half in the S2 episode that most egregiously pissed me off ("Charades"). This allows them to temporarily become full-blooded Vulcans, which somehow magically alters their entire personalities (to say nothing of their hairstyles) despite none of them having ever undertaken the years of meditation, philosophical indoctrination and mental discipline that makes Vulcans the ice-cold SOBs they are. As ludicrous as it is, the episode makes a tiny, feeble attempt to explain this – something about how their Vulcanness really reflects Spock's perception of Vulcans – so it should come as no surprise to him that they are absolute, racist jerks who constantly remind Spock that he isn't even fully Vulcan. They basically become all of his childhood bullies. And then they just refuse to change back into humans at the end of the mission which, itself, isn't all that important for this story. Also oddly, La'An kind of becomes a Romulan. This is the kind of nonsense that Star Trek indulges in from time to time and that never fails to make me furious. As funny as this episode is in some of its details, it's built on a science fiction concept so stupid that it's unbearable to think about. In terms of shark jumping, this is the ski jump that launches the Fonz straight past the heliopause, into the interstellar void.

"Terrarium" is the episode that strands Ortegas on a moon, orbiting a gas giant on the wrong side of a wormhole, with a Gorn. There, despite her Gorn-related trauma (cf. "Hegemony, Part II"), she has to learn to make friends with the enemy in order to survive, while back on the Enterprise, it's a close-run thing whether the crew will be able to rescue her before either the wormhole collapses or they have to leave on a crucial mission. The Metrons (cf. TOS's "Arena") play a role in this, which I think is the biggest flaw in an otherwise all-right episode.

"New Life and New Civilizations" ties up the season as a whole, and particularly the plot threads regarding what Batel has become since she became fused with Gorn young'uns, Illyrian blood and that chimera flower from Kenfori, and what Gamble became on that planet with the temple-that-wasn't-really-a-temple. Before she commits herself to an eternity standing guard over a galactic demon prison, Batel and Pike share a lifetime together a la TNG's "The Inner Light," in what is maybe the most moving passage in this entire series to-date.

So, as I said, this show pulled increasingly steep shark jumps at least three times, and yet it goes on. I hear Season 4 will have an episode where the main cast gets turned into Muppets. So they're not done shooting the shark tank. Nevertheless, here are Three Highlights of This Season for Me – I won't say they "made it for me" because in the overall balance, I don't particularly care for this season of Trek, despite a couple of bright spots – (1) Patton Oswalt, as "Doug," a Vulcan who has embraced human behavior and who has somehow become irresistable to Number One, riffs with Spock in a series of hilarious outtakes. (2) "Terrarium" with its "infinite diversity in infinite combinations" theme of coming to a mutual understanding with your enemy, really represents what Star Trek has always been about. (3) The season finale's "Inner Light" interlude, which gives Batel and Pike the gift of a lifetime together that they can never really share. It hits emotionally, really hard.

Star Trek: Prodigy, Season 2

I've fallen way behind on my reviews of TV seasons that I watched on DVD. So here's a quick catch-up, starting with my favorite: Star Trek: Prodigy Season 2.

The second and, alas, last season of the animated series Prodigy is a breathtaking document of the Trek establishment's mixed-up priorities. This show should have been the one that kept going for years and years. It is, in my opinion, the best recent Star Trek series – my dad, who's been a Trekkie since the original series first aired, is of the same opinion. And it's definitely, hands down, the best animated Trek show ever. But it got canceled after only one season, and Season 2 only exists because it was in post-production at the time and there were contractual commitments, etc., etc. So, at least we got this. It's not perfect, but it's darn close.

The show continues the adventures of a group of misfit kids who, in Season 1, escaped from a slave planet on board a time-displaced Starfleet ship that they found deep in the mines. You may recall how they ended up becoming Starfleet cadets after saving the Federation from a disaster partly of their inadvertent making. Now we find cocky would-be captain Dal, science genius Rok Tahk, "percussive maintenance" specialist Jankom Pog, noncorporeal alien in a mechanical suit Zero and indestructible, verbally incomprehensible but increasingly anthropomorphic blob Murf joining a mission on Admiral Janeway's crew on a souped-up Starship Voyager, on a secret mission to find the missing Chakotay, while Gwyn tries to convince her people, the xenophobic Vau N'Akat of the planet Solum, to be open to first contact with aliens.

Naturally, everything goes disastrously wrong. In the season's two-part premiere, "Into the Breach," the meddling cadets prematurely take a ship through a time wormhole, inserting themselves into the wrong page of history. And though Gwyn connects with a kinder, gentler version of her Diviner dad, named Ilthuran, she faces a relentless enemy in the treacherous Ascentia, who is willing to mess with the fabric of reality to achieve her fanatic aims.

The season continues with "Who Saves the Saviors," in which Gwyn faces Ascencia in a ritual contest while the other cadets meet Chakotay in the Diviner's jail, inadvertently letting him escape in the Protostar in a way that disrupts the whole timeline and threatens Gwyn's very existence. "Temporal Mechanics 101" is about the cadets' efforts to rescue Gwyn, turning their ship into a time machine and taking her back to the Voyager. "Observer's Paradox" finds the kids struggling to understand mysterious messages telling them to stay together and "find me." In "Imposter Syndrome," they create holographic copies of themselves to cover for them while they sneak off on another ill-advised mission. Hilarity ensues. In "The Fast and the Curious," the kids are taken captive by a sentient computer that forces them to compete in a dangerous race, an encounter that leads to Zero's containment suit being disabled.

"Is There in Beauty No Truth?" introduces a planet of Medusans (Zero's people) who have found a way to assume bodily form. They offer Zero a chance to experience physical senses, but the gift comes with strings attached – like, his body will die if he ever leaves the planet. In the two-part episode "The Devourer of All Things," the kids learn that the sender of those mysterious messages was spacetime Traveler Wesley Crusher, and that their entire reality is threatened by terrifying monsters called the Loom who devour anything displaced in time. In another two-parter called "Last Flight of the Protostar," the kids find Chakotay marooned on a very strange planet with the Protostar, minus its warp core, and they work out a way to get it flying again.

"A Tribble Called Quest" finds the kids looking for a warp core ingredient on a planet infested with giant, carnivorous tribbles. In "Cracked Mirror," they find their way back to the Voyager, only to find it split between multiple, alternate timelines – including a Mirror Universe where Janeway and Chakotay are evil. In the two-parter "Ascension," Ascencia attacks Protostar and Voyager and is revealed to be holding Wesley captive, torturing temporal technology out of him to prepare a final attack on Starfleet. "Brink" is about a rescue mission to save both Wes and Ilthuran from Ascencia's clutches. "Touch of Grey" finds the kids threatened by a Loom that Ascencia has captured and enslaved. And the two-part episode "Ouroboros" ends the season, and the series, with the climactic struggle between Ascencia and everybody else, always with the Loom threatening to erase their entire reality.

That's super-oversimplified, but I highly recommend watching the whole season. There are frustrating bits where the characters, particularly Dal, seem to be letting you down, but bear in mind that in a half-hour episode format, all this is part of a larger, serialized story and the characters show real growth. Cast members include everybody from Season 1, plus (increasingly) Robert Beltran returning as Chakotay, Robert Picardo as the Doctor (from Voyager), Jason Alexander and Daveed Diggs as Janeway's bridge officers, Michaela Dietz as Vulcan cadet Maj'el, Ronny Cox as Admiral Jellico (reprising his Next Generation role), Gates McFadden as Beverly Crusher, Billy Campbell as one-time TNG character Okona, Eric Menyuk as two-time TNG guest The Traveler, and real-life science educator Erin Macdonald as a holographic version of herself.

It's tragic, I say, that this show didn't get the recognition it deserved as the strongest of the past decade's crop of Trek series, and that it couldn't go on longer. The characters' growth and chemistry together is lovely to witness. The dialogue is good. The stories are excellent. It's top-quality science fiction, structured for a Nickelodeon, kids' network audience but, perhaps as a consequence of that, highly satisfying for viewers of all ages. It's full of the optimism for the future that glows through the classic era of Trek, from the original series through Enterprise, and it makes good use of legacy characters without taking away from the hero kids' role in the forefront of the cast.

It has terrifying monsters, fiendish villains, rogues, creepy-crawlies and breathtaking, alien vistas. The Loom! The eels and leviathans on that sand planet with the vapor seas! Those bitey tribbles! That good-for-nothing Okona! That sentient computer with its deadly race course! Not to mention the Kazon and of course, Ascencia. It has characters who come to a tragic end, characters who suffer unimaginable agony, characters seen at their worst (such as the Bizarro versions of Janeway and Chakotay) ... but it also has people of all colors (including purple), sexes (including none) and body shapes (including none) aspiring to make the universe a better place for everybody. It's funny. It's a bit mind-bending, with all that temporal mechanics stuff. And it's a thrill ride from start to finish.

To put a point on it, here are Three Things That Made It For Me: (1) Putting life back into Chakotay after he's spent years marooned on an eel-infested sandbar. (2) Zero's heartbreaking taste of corporeal existence and what it costs him to sacrifice it for his friends. (3) Hard as it may be to believe, Wesley Crusher's role, suggesting some pretty interesting adventures he must have had since becoming one of those nearly omnipotent Travelers. Once again, this two-season series has my full endorsement.

591. Psalm of a Restless Night

A loose paraphrase of Psalm 6, titled "To the chief musician, with stringed instruments, on an eight-stringed harp." Not coincidentally, I wrote it around 2 a.m. Art: Child at Prayer by Eastman Johnson, c. 1873, public domain.

My bed dissolves in tears;
With sweat my pillow swims.
All night I groan with restless fears,
With vain designs and whims.
My eyes are sore with weary grief:
Lord, chasten not my unbelief!

Rebuke me not with ire;
Have mercy! I am weak.
Restore the bones Your holy fire
Has well-nigh brought to break!
Restore my soul—O Lord, how long?
Return with Your salvation strong!

For in the grave's dumb sleep
Who, Lord, will sing Your praise?
In death, who will remembrance keep
Of all Your gracious ways?
Depart from me, iniquity!
I cried, and God gave ear to me.

The Lord indeed has heard
My heart's despondent prayer:
He gives His never-failing word
To shoulder all my care.
Let all that troubles me retreat:
Before me stands the Mercy-Seat.

P.S. Here's an original tune to go with this hymn.

Fuze

Earlier this weekend, I drove a two-hour round trip – not in the usual direction – to see one of only two movies playing in my wider area that I was interested in seeing. It was a matter of timing whether I chose Over My Dead Body, a black comedy-action movie about a married couple trying to kill each other, or Fuze. Because I wanted to drive home in daylight, and OMDB's only matinee showing started too soon after I knocked off work on Friday, I ended up seeing Fuze.

It's not a coincidence that Fuze, besides being the title of this movie, is the British spelling of the part of a bomb that Wile E. Coyote lights before running for cover. You know, what we in the U.S. spell f-u-s-e. According to a screen card at the end of the film, it's also supposedly a charity that disarms bombs, but I can find no evidence that this is a real thing. In this movie, Aaron Taylor-Johnson (Anna Karenina, The Fall Guy) plays a U.K. Army major who heads a bomb disposal unit that gets called in when a construction dig in London unearths what appears to be an unexploded World War II bomb. Before his team can begin trying to disarm it, a whole square mile of London has to be evacuated – except for a gang of crooks who, right on cue – I mean that, as if they've been expecting an unexploded bomb to force the evacuation that day – seize the opportunity to drill a hole in the wall of a bank vault. The crooks include, no surprise, some shady characters, played by Sam Worthington (Avatar, Terminator Salvation) and Theo James (Divergent, The Time Traveler's Wife) among others, who get away by the skin of their teeth and then immediately turn on each other, all while one of the Army major's underlings plants an official seed of doubt about the bomb actually being of WW2 origin.

Double crosses, brutal violence, fast-moving police work and even faster-moving crooks escaping form the tissue of this movie, with characters switching which side they're are on (like, good or evil) in a manner that I guess was meant to be surprising or keep you guessing but that I saw coming from high orbit. I actually groaned to myself: "Don't tell me this guy is ... " But let's not spoil it for those of you who want to guess for yourselves. The only real surprise that kept me on the edge of my seat was whether the criminal masterminds were going to get away, and get rich. Your suspense is whether it's the kind of story where the crooks end up dead, or in handcuffs, or maybe getting away with their skin mostly intact but losing all the loot, or is there a "happy ending" for the bad guys and are we supposed to (cough) "stop your crying, it's a sign of the times" (sorry, Project Hail Mary) or will the movie actually try to sell us a reason to sympathize with them? Like, are the villains villains or not? Or are just some of them villains?

I'd like to say the movie settles these questions in a satisfying manner. However, what I walked away with, or rather drove away with (super conscious of what a long drive it was), was thoughts like, "What was the point of (spoiler redacted) doing such-and-so when he could have saved him having his hand smashed with a pipe wrench, or being shoved into the trunk of a car, or having a plastic bag pulled down over his head," etc., etc. – decisions that led to betrayals and vendettas and imminent danger of death and, for some characters, actual death, all of which (spoiler redacted) could have spared himself without costing him anything. But oh, well, it made the second half of the movie exciting and the pacing was such that you really had to be jaded with fast-paced excitement to even think these thoughts. But I thought them. And it took me out of the story, I'm sad to say. Also, the movie's narrative structure kind of falls apart at the end, explaining all the stuff that it couldn't explain to you earlier without spoiling its own surprises in a "10 years ago" epilogue, which in my opinion is a sign that the writer(s) didn't properly think the thing through.

There were, however, sufficient things that made the movie for me to enumerate three: (1) Aaron Taylor-Johnson's alpha-stud hunkiness, which actually hits a stratospheric level in the scene where he reprimands his too-curious-for-comfort underling for taking unacceptable risks. You see in his eyes a combination of tender concern for a pipsqueak who's really, objectively, a pain in the ass, along with a tortured remnant of some past trauma about which the characters who know him have been dropping whispered hints. You know how it goes. He made a mistake in Afghanistan and some people died – his people. The writing is obvious, indeed hackneyed, but ATJ's acting is legit. (2) Gugu Mbatha-Raw, playing a police superintendent, being so good at her job that it would be astonishing if the crooks got away with it, which I won't say whether they did or not. (3) Those end-of-the-movie titles, one of which delivers really disappointing tidings of what one of the main characters did with himself later on ... then goes, "Just kidding." Whew! An honorary mention: The army bomb disposal squad's alternative to saying "break a leg," which sounds grossly insubordinate when that pipsqueak corporal says it to his immediate superior. I guess when your job is disabling high explosives, you can do without words of encouragement like "Do your best" or "Good luck" but ... "Don't be shit"? Really?

Catechesis Warm-Up Songs, Part 6

The sixth and final "chief part" of Luther's Small Catechism addresses the Sacrament of the Altar, a.k.a. the Lord's Supper, a.k.a. the Eucharist, a.k.a. Holy Communion, a.k.a. The Mass. Luther's question-and-answer structure divides nicely into four units, which doesn't necessarily mean it will take that many classroom sessions to cover it, but I'm providing a hymn for each of the four anyway. It's a weighty subject, worthy of considerable meditation. So here are some songs that I hope will help prepare young minds for such a meditation. ART: The Last Supper by Jaume Huguet, 1470, public domain.

587. What Is the Sacrament?
Tune: ARFON, Welsh
(cf. "Chief of sinners though I be" and "What our Father does is well" in Australia's Lutheran Hymnal)

Cup of blessing which we bless,
Bread that harbors righteousness,
Be for me the highest good:
Jesus' body, Jesus' blood
Sacrificed, now seal to me
God's forgiveness, full and free!

Reason finds it grossly strange
That Christ would such meal arrange,
Giving that to eat and drink
From which dainty minds must shrink:
His true body, His true blood,
In and under earthly food!

But His word cannot be torn.
His Passover vow is sworn:
Holy flesh bared to the bone,
Veins laid open to atone.
Would you see your debts erased?
Hear His promise; open, taste!

God spoke on that festal night,
Pledging pardon and delight
In the bread that harbors love,
Vintage drawn from heav'n above:
God's own body, God's own blood,
Served in perfect servanthood.

588. What Does the Sacrament Do?
Tune: HERR JESU CHRIST, MEINS LEBENS LICHT, Leipzig, 1625
(cf. "Lord Jesus Christ, my Life, my Light")

O Flesh that purified the flails
Which tore You, Hands that blessed the nails
Which pierced You through, stretch out to me:
Your healing touch shall set me free.

Probe deep in me, corrupt and sore;
Uncleanness can abide no more.
With blood that seasoned vulgar wood,
Make white my stains, my foulness good.

Come, not to heart and soul alone,
But even to my flesh and bone:
My mouth with Your atonement feed,
That all my members may be freed.

And if I thus am reckoned pure,
I may count my redemption sure:
For where God's peace and pardon dwell,
Life and salvation camp as well.

589. How Does the Sacrament Do This?
Tune: O JESU CHRISTE, WAHRES LICHT, Nürnberg, 1676
(cf. "O Christ, our true and only Light")

Ask you how can it all be true
That our Lord's Supper claims to do?
Only keep Jesus' words in view:
"Given and shed to ransom you."

Strange things God says, let none deny:
Yet not one error, not one lie.
His word turns none and naught to yes
And reckons faith as righteousness.

Knowing that Christ does not deceive,
What He declares therefore believe,
And for His sacrifice's sake
Of His last testament partake.

Partake, believing, and obtain
That which no pow'r of yours can gain:
Forgiveness, drenched in offered blood;
God's very body, giv'n as food.

Then with that bread and in that cup,
A blessed fellowship you sup:
Communion with the saints above,
United in the Savior's love.

590. Who Receives the Sacrament Worthily?
Tune: MERTON by William H. Monk, 1861
(cf. "Hark! a thrilling voice is sounding")

Fasting, outward exercises,
And such discipline are fine:
Yet belief alone comprises
Worthiness with Christ to dine.

Some, who have His pledge forsaken
And His presence here denied,
Still have of this feast partaken
And eternally have died.

Christ is present, irrespective
Of what those who sup believe;
For His promise is effective:
What He pledges, we receive.

But the benefit is given
To the eater who perceives
In this bread the King of heaven,
Hung between two earthy thieves.

Yea, the cup of joy is ladled
From the blood He spilled for all,
When the Bridegroom's head was cradled
In a myrrh-anointed pall.

To His testament's believer
All things broken are made whole,
Faith alone the blest receiver
Of His promised PAID IN FULL.

Let us then with care and pleasure
Eat and drink what Christ declared,
That we may enjoy the treasure
That His kindness has prepared.

Catechesis Warm-Up Songs, Part 5

Part 5 of Luther's Small Catechism, at least the version used in my corner of Lutheranism for instruction in the faith, has to do with the Office of the Keys (the power to forgive and retain sins) and confession and absolution. So, as these two hymns emphasize, Christ at work through means, through men to whom He has delegated such wonderful authority, and sinners finding comfort for their burdened consciences. Basically, the nitty gritty of the gospel as Lutheranism faithfully teaches and confesses it. ART: Christ giving the Keys of Heaven by Peter Paul Rubens (†1640), public domain.

585. The Office of the Keys
Tune: TALLIS' CANON by Thomas Tallis, 1565
(cf. "All praise to Thee, my God, this night")

Christ gave the Office of the Keys
To set tormented souls at ease,
And flouters of the Law to spurn
Till in repentance they return.

We thank You, Lord, for calling men
To loose our sins; for surely when
They pardon us, we may believe
That Your forgiveness we receive.

Just so, we praise Your holy mind
That binds as well the sins they bind:
For he who on his own strength leans
Should fear indeed Your earthly means.

Through such means, Lord, toward us You reach:
Through hands that serve, through mouths that teach;
Therefore Your gifts, our Savior dear,
And You Yourself are always near.

586. Confession and Absolution
Tune: EVAN by William Henry Havergal, 1846
(cf. "Oh, that the Lord would guide my ways")

Cast off, O Lord, my heavy pall,
Sin's agonizing weight!
Oh, come, my Hope, my Life, my All:
Your pardon I await.

Unto Your servant I confess
The sins I know and feel;
Whate'er remains, let grace address,
Though it be dire and real.

And when he speaks the freeing word
My wounded conscience craves,
Help me believe what I have heard:
Your word that heals and saves.

Catechesis Warm-Up Songs, Part 4

The fourth chief part of Luther's Small Catechism, the Sacrament of Holy Baptism, is divided into four units. Here's a warm-up song for a class session on each unit. I don't know if this part of the instruction course will necessarily require four sessions, but I'm just going with how Luther structured the material. Use or skip whichever ones you like, if any. ART: 12th century baptismal font in Väte Church, Gotland, Sweden. Photo by Helen Simonsson licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license.

581. What Is Baptism?
Tune: ALLE JAHRE WIEDER by Johann C.H. Rinck, 1827
(“As each happy Christmas“)

Praise the Lord, who sought me
When I was astray,
And in truth begot me
In a wondrous way!

I was in baptism
Reborn from above.
God has healed the schism
’Twixt me and His love.

Scripture, never lying,
States what here occurred:
His own hand applying
Water and the word.

Water and the Spirit,
Put another way,
Soaks me in Christ’s merit,
Puts my sin away.

Ah! What joy, what pleasure
God’s dear child to be!
Praise Him, who such treasure
Freely gives to me!

582. What Does Baptism Do?
Tune: SAELIR ERU TRÚADIR, Bohemian, 15th cent.
(“And then the Savior turned“)

Christ blessed us as He bled,
With pardon sighing;
He bowed His blameless head,
For sinners dying.

Now is death’s curtain torn,
New life unveiling.
The risen Christ has sworn,
His truth unfailing:

The baptized He will save;
Be then believing,
Despite the yawning grave
This hope receiving!

For what He says is true;
His word has power,
From when He washes you
Till your last hour.

Sin, hell and Satan quail;
Death shrinks before Him.
For Jesus does not fail;
Let all adore Him!

583. How Does Baptism Do This?
Tune: WIR HATTEN GEBAUET, German folksong, 1823
(“When Christmas morn is dawning“)

O Jesus, You submitted
To baptism here on earth,
Who had no sin committed,
No guilty ache to nurse.
Thus baptism You have fitted
With pardon and rebirth.

Bare water is invested
With Your almighty Word;
The Spirit, who once rested
Upon the deep, has stirred
A living faith, attested
By promise poured and heard.

Your washing recreates us,
The old makes fresh and new.
God’s Breath regenerates us;
The Father’s voice speaks true:
As heirs He designates us,
As dear to Him as You.

Your grace thereby is giving
A gift beyond compare:
All we have done forgiving,
New tasks You now prepare.
We shall not die but, living,
The works of God declare.

584. What Does Baptism Signify?
Tune: ST. DENIO, Welsh
(“Immortal, invisible, God only wise“)

How blessèd a rest, shared by all the baptized,
United in death, yea, and buried with Christ!
From sin we are freed, our indictment erased,
At peace with our God, in His bosom embraced.

What life now proceeds, only Jesus has seen:
It will be like His, as our death too has been.
In pleasing perfume and pure garments arrayed,
We walk in His light, on His promises stayed.

And now to the Father, and now to the Son,
And now to the Spirit, from all ages One,
The all-wise, all-powerful Ancient of Days,
Now and to all ages be glory and praise.

The Faraway Inn

The Faraway Inn
by Sarah Beth Durst
Recommended Ages: 14+

Calisa needs to get away from New York for the summer after her junior year in high school. She just caught her boyfriend cheating on her, and lying to her, and she needs time away from anything that reminds her of him. Nursing her heartbreak, she travels to her great aunt's bed and breakfast in the Vermont woods, only to be told she can't stay. Auntie Zee, whom she hasn't seen since she was a little girl, is pretty brusque about it. And the place looks like it's about to fall down.

Fighting back against being sent straight home, Calisa makes herself useful. She cooks. She cleans. She helps the groundskeeper's son, an unnervingly cute boy named Jack, about whom the least thought the better because a rebound relationship totally isn't what she needs right now. And little by little, the place starts looking better, and the handful of eccentric guests seem a bit happier, and Auntie Zee says less and less about sending Calisa back home. And also, Calisa starts noticing weird things going on around the place. Weird things like, maybe, magic. Magic like, maybe, doorways doing double duty – closets one day, portals to another dimension the next. By the time she cottons to the lizard who imprints on her actually being a dragon, and the front hallway having both a magic mirror and a magic teapot in it, and the guests including a dryad, a wizard and a sea witch, Calisa is perilously close to discovering why the Faraway Inn is failing and what she can do – has to do – if it's going to continue being a refuge, an excape, that people from all kinds of strange places really need.

I've read a few of Sarah Beth Durst's many books, including one of her cozy fantasies, The Spellshop. And I've dipped my toe into the cozy fantasy genre just often enough to pick up on one of its persistent themes, as sure to show up as octopus imagery in steampunk: representation for alternative identities and family structures that rule this cultural moment. I feel I owe it to faith-oriented families who are concerned about what the character of the material they share with their children to send up a mild Adult Content Advisory about it. But it's mild, perhaps because this is Durst's first foray into YA cozy fantasy, which (in her afterword) she designed around the idea that teens, too, sometimes need a safe place to escape to. Also mild, but worth mentioning, is an Occult Content Advisory because, well, Calisa and her auntie are witches and there is some magic in the book, albeit of the "only in a fantasy novel" variety.

The only other advisory I want to post here is "You may feel like you've been here before." I mean, if the idea of a B&B being a nexus of interdimensional portals gives you a sense of déjà vu, it's true that I've also reviewed Clete Barrett Smith's "Intergalactic Bed & Breakfast" trilogy and Cerberus Jones' "The Gateway" series, which are based on closely adjacent concepts, though skewing a bit more toward science fiction. When Calisa walks through a portal, though, she isn't traveling to a different planet; just a different "realm," whatever that means. Also, the kids in this kids' book are a bit older – old enough to have a romance brewing between them that could be fun to read about, if you're a kid of a certain age and aren't grossed out by kissy stuff. It's a warm, comforting, kind book with no dramatic stakes beyond whether some people will end up happy. And it has a point-of-view character who makes jaw-dropping discoveries, not only about what's going on around her, but about the power within herself.

Sarah Beth Durst's other titles include The Girl Who Could Not Dream, The Shelterlings, Spy Ring and The Warbler, as well as going-on-three sequels to The Spellshop including one, due out next year, called The Magical Cheese Emporium. Even if there's no other incentive to catch up on my reading, a title like that ought to do it.

You, Me & and Tuscany

I've been skipping the movies for a couple of weeks because nothing new has been showing that I was even slightly tempted to see. How fondly I remember an era when that almost never happened. But here we are. I finally bowed under the weight of needing to do something with my evening and took an hour-and-a-half round trip just to see this movie. And wouldn't you know it, it's exactly the plot of a Hallmark Channel movie of the week, the kind I used to watch every weekend with my parents before they moved to another state. (Boo. However, they took me out for lunch last week while passing through the area, so I forgive them.)

OK, it's maybe a little spicier than most Hallmark movies. Nia Vardalos of My Big Fat Greek Wedding drops an F-bomb in practically the first scene. The male lead, the Zimbabwean stud from Bridgerton, playing a London-educated Italian vineyard owner, gets heckled by the horny women in a passing tour bus who (in a closing credits outtake reel) are allowed to riff at off-color length. The hero girl Anna, played by Halle (Bailey, not Berry) of the girl band Halle & Chloe, actually plans on sleeping with the nice Italian guy she meets in an NYC hotel bar, but luckily for Hallmark fans' moral sensibilities she comes back from freshening herself up in the bathroom to find him passed out from jet lag on the bed. The misunderstandings that spiral out of control, until a pair of lovers' hearts are in jeopardy, actually start with Anna knowingly and deliberately committing burglary. She's no flower of innocence. But all in all, it still has that wholesome, "isn't it funny how love happens sometimes" thing going for it that you almost only see on cable TV anymore. And here it is, playing in movie theaters!

Let's back up to the beginning. Anna was studying to be a chef until her mom, also a chef, got sick and died. Now she doesn't know what to do with herself, except she doesn't want to cook. After getting fired (for good reason) from a housesitting gig, she runs for help to her friend, who works in a hotel, and who can only help her as far as comping her a drink in the hotel bar. While she's maxing her credit cards out ordering a burger, she meets an Italian dude, Matteo, who tells her all about the family he's running away from in Tuscany, and the restaurant he didn't want to take over from his dad, and the villa he owns but can't stand the sight of, and after the jet lag thing happens, she thinks, "Hey, I have an open ticket to Tuscany that my mom bought me as a graduation gift. I should go!" And predictably, she ends up staying in Matteo's villa. Also predictably, Matteo's momma and nonna catch her there, but luckily she was just trying on the engagement ring she found in a desk drawer and they put two and two together and, faced with the alternative of being arrested, she lets them think she and Matteo are getting married. The whole family gets swept up in the deception, including the cousin/adoptive brother, Michael – the vineyard owner whose eight-pack becomes a highlight of a passing bus tour, and with whom Anna starts to feel a real, mutual attraction just when Matteo sweeps into town. And of course, as soon as he sees how happy Anna's deception has made his family, he joins right in. Only he's not into her, she's not into him and things between Matteo and Michael go from bad to worse ... right up to the Hallmark Channel patent formula, 15-minutes-before-the-end crisis when all becomes clear except whether the true lovers will find true love.

So, there are no surprises. And in addition to all the hallmarks of Hallmark, there's also the fact that we (meaning I) just saw Solo Mio a minute ago, also featuring an American who stumbles upon romance in the Italian countryside, right down to a scene with a race in the streets of a small town (men rolling wine barrels in this case, horses in the other). And while Andrea Bocelli doesn't appear in this movie, as himself or anyone else, there is a guy who wakes Anna up every morning, all cockerel like, singing "Brindisi" from La Traviata. (Funnily enough, the song is much more forgiving of Giuseppe the groundskeeper's amateur voice than Nessun dorma as sung by Kevin James.) Also, of course, there are vineyards in both movies. Where this movie actually tops Kevin James' opus is in the space it gives the members of the love interest's Italian family to develop as distinct characters, portrayed with such affection that you care about them and believe that Anna would come to do so as well. Instead of flooding the cast with American tourists (again, like the James film) whose personality quirks upstage the Italian cyphers, this movie actually fills the screen with these small-town folks and creates a sense of home and warmth and emotional stakes that an audience (gasp, even in the U.S.) can really feel.

So, in spite of all I've said about this being a cable TV movie stretched onto the big screen, it is for sure a better movie than Solo Mio. It made me feel good. And I'm happy to present the Three Scenes That Made It For Me: (1) Whatever scene Lorenzo, the cab driver, is in. Anna doesn't take his advice (to tell everyone the truth from the start), but he is delighted with how "romantic" her way of handling the situation is, and that makes his appearances throughout the movie charming, funny and strategically mood lightening. (2) The scenes where Anna cooks, whether it's tomato toast for one (or two) in Matteo's villa or the special of the day on the last day of the summer festival in the family's restaurant. I want to eat all of that food. (3) Of course, the knock-down fight between Matteo and Michael, when the truth finally has to come out because two brothers are about to kill each other over a romantic rivalry that doesn't really exist. It's the kind of thing they write operas about.

Old Spice

OFFICIAL: Who's next?

DUDE: That'll be me.

OFFICIAL: What can I help you with?

(DUDE unzips what appears to be a shaving kit and starts pulling out various spice jars and lining them up on the counter)

DUDE: I'd like to register these spices to vote.

OFFICIAL: You what? Surely you're not serious.

DUDE: Ain't I? I'm actually kind of ashamed I didn't get around to this in time for the last election cycle.

OFFICIAL: But how could you dream that this could be legal?

DUDE: If it's about the age requirement, they're old enough for sure. My goodness, I've had this jar of marjoram since the George W. Bush administration. And I'm pretty sure I inherited this canister of chili powder from my grandma.

OFFICIAL: I see. Well, there's a problem with that. You have to be a person to vote.

DUDE: Oh, these guys have personality all right. Terragon here is such a card! And oh, my goodness, cayenne is opinionated.

OFFICIAL: I mean a human person.

DUDE: So, like, Soylent Green is good enough, but not an honest fella from Indonesia like, say, nutmeg here? That smacks of racism if you ask me.

OFFICIAL: Now wait a minute, you can't just throw around accusations like that.

DUDE: Why not? What's wrong with being brown? Or green? Or ... what is this color, exactly? And it's not as if they still hold the flavor of their homeland, after all this time. They're quite assimilated.

OFFICIAL: It's a matter of citizenship. Being able to make a useful contribution to society, and all that.

DUDE: Useful? You want useful? These guys give flavor to life. They're the only reason I can choke down the cheap rubbish I can afford to bring home from the market. Also, I'm pretty sure turmeric is an over-the-counter medicine these days.

OFFICIAL: (squinting at the date on a jar of paprika) But look here, this stuff is expired.

DUDE: That hasn't stopped plenty of voters from getting registered!

Catechesis Warm-Up Songs, Part 3

For Part 3 of this group of youth catechesis ditties, we move on to the third chief part of Luther's Small Catechism: The Lord's Prayer, a.k.a. the Our Father, which Luther analyzes as seven petitions plus an introduction (what it means to pray to God as "our Father") and the meaning of the word "Amen." So, it's a part with nine subparts, and at the risk of having more warm-up songs than actual lessons, here's a song for each of them. Art: The Lord's Prayer by James Tissot, †1902, public domain.

572. Praying to Our Father
Tune: NUN DANKET ALL by Johann Crüger, 1656
(cf. "Come, let us join our cheerful songs," etc.)

Our Father! Oh, how wondrous dear
It is that name to say
And know the Lord is sure to hear,
Since so He bids us pray!

Disciples, see what steadfast love
Our Father to us shows,
That He who dwells in heav'n above
Stoops down to hold us close.

See with what love He holds us now
To be His children dear,
His charge to pray a very vow
Our heart's desire to hear.

Christ is our advocate; indeed,
The Spirit bids us cry
"Our Father! Abba!" in our need:
Who are we to deny?

Our Father! So our prayer shall flow
From faith as fragrant sap.
Oh, grant that when no words we know,
Your love will fill the gap!

573. Hallowing God's Name (1st Petition)
Tune: LOBT DEN HERRN, DIE MORGENSONNE, Halle, 1829
(cf. "Hark! the Church proclaims her honor")

Holy is Your name, dear Father;
Be it likewise in our midst.
Let our hearts and lips no other
Name in creed or prayer enlist.

Yea, with Christ and with the Spirit
We confess You Three in One:
Would we call on You in fear, it
Cannot otherwise be done.

Set aside Your name among us
By the witness we have heard:
For the serpent's tooth had stung us
Ere You sent the living Word.

He it is whose blood and dying,
Yea, whose victory makes clean.
Every other rock denying,
On the name of Christ we lean.

Through the Word Your name possessing,
We find mercy, peace, and light.
Lord, secure to us this blessing:
Keep our doctrine pure and right!

Frustrate them whose faithless teaching
Would Your holy name disgrace!
Seal us with Your truth, till reaching
Paradise, we see Your face.

574. The Kingdom of God (2nd Petition)
Tune: GOTT SEI DANK, Halle, 1704
(cf. "Jesus! Name of wondrous love," etc.)

Lord, Your kingdom surely comes
Everywhere, without delay,
Though our generation plumbs
Depths of wickedness each day.

Bring Your kingdom even now,
Even here by us, we plead:
Reign in bosom, reign in brow,
Reign in word and silent deed!

Build with us as living stones
Such a house as suits Your word;
Quicken our dry, useless bones,
For Your saving purpose spurred.

Move our hands and stir our feet;
Open mouths to testify,
Leading to Your kingly seat
Those who now in bondage lie.

Not in highest heav'n alone,
Far removed from man or beast,
But among us bring Your throne,
Savior of the lost and least!

575. The Will of God (3rd Petition)
Tune: LUTHER SEMINARY by John Dahle, 1911
(cf. "Lord of the everlasting light," etc.)

As in the heavens, so on earth
Be Your will done, O Lord,
Who our salvation brought to birth
And still rich gifts afford!

It lies in You, not us, to judge
What best supplies our need.
While through hard passages we trudge,
Help us good news to heed.

All counsels break that will not let
Your name be glorified,
Your kingdom come—that rather set
What pleases You aside.

But strengthen us against our foes
Within, around, below;
Preserve us through their raging throes
While You Your purpose show.

And when our pilgrimage is past,
The curtain swiftly draw:
Reveal Your mysteries at last
To our devout "Aha!"

576. Daily Bread (4th Petition)
Tune: FESTAL SONG by William Henry Walter, †1893
(cf. "For all your saints, O Lord," etc.)

For daily bread, O God,
Our eyes on You are set.
All needs at home and those abroad
You perfectly have met.

Not only for our food,
Lord, are we in Your debt:
For You supply us every good,
Ne'er slumber, ne'er forget.

We thank You for our toils
That hunger often whet,
And for our labor's honest spoils,
The fruit borne of our sweat.

Yea, all the means You use
To blunt dread famine's threat
We take as gifts and not as dues,
Spurn worry and regret.

And should our prayer, O Lord,
Be answered with "Not yet,"
Fix eye and heart on our reward
Before all ages set.

577. The Forgiveness of Sins (5th Petition)
Tune: LLEF by Griffith Hugh Jones, †1919
(cf. "That day of wrath, that dreadful day")

Father, forgive our daily sins!
We know full well what we have done:
Our prayer, our worship scarce begins
When into vanity we run!

Pardon the injuries we deal
Our neighbor both in word and deed—
Even at heart, wrongs just as real:
Each crooked thought, each unfelt need.

Pardon the virtues we presume
Before Your righteous eyes to flaunt:
The pride itself that merits doom,
The half-obedience we vaunt.

On their account, almighty God,
You rightly could reject our prayer;
Only because of Jesus' blood
We beg and trust You to forbear.

Therefore we pray, for Jesus' sake,
Forgive our faults; erase our debt!
With Your help, we will undertake
Our neighbor's trespass to forget.

578. Delivered from Temptation (6th Petition)
Tune: PICARDY, French, 17th century
(cf. "Let all mortal flesh keep silence")

Lead us not into temptation!
Lord, You know our weakness well,
And from Eden's desolation
Fought right to the gates of hell:
Only You the foe's frustration
Have fulfilled since Adam fell.

Be our strength when Satan's guises
Blur our view of what You will;
When the flesh's lure surprises,
Bent on luxury or thrill;
When the world dins what it prizes
All around us, never still.

Jesus, Adam's greater scion,
Watch with us another day!
Keep from us the roaring lion,
Prowling for unguarded prey,
That we may at last to Zion
Muster safely from the fray.

579. Delivered from Evil (7th Petition)
Tune: WEM IN LEIDENSTAGEN by Friedrich Filitz, 1847
(cf. "Glory be to Jesus")

Jesus, see what evils
Threaten us today!
Errors and upheavals
Press in on our way.

From ills of the body—
Famine, plague, and sword,
Vices gross and gaudy—
Save us, holy Lord!

From ills of the spirit
Likewise be our Guard,
Lest we, drawing near it,
From Your feast be barred.

Yea, we dare implore You,
Guard our goods and fame
Till we stand before You
Safe from earthly shame.

Never, Lord, forsake us
In our woes and fears,
Hastening to take us
From this vale of tears.

580. Saying Amen
Tune: LOBT GOTT, IHR CHRISTEN by Nikolaus Herman, 1554
(cf. "Praise God the Lord, ye sons of men")

Lord, Yours the kingdom, Yours the pow'r
And glory without end
From all eternity, this hour,
And evermore, Amen!
Again we say, Amen!

This word Amen, confessing truth,
Befits believing prayer;
For You have taught us from our youth
To trust Your promise fair
And witness to it bear.

We learned the very words we pray
From You, Immanuel.
With certainty Amen we say,
For no lie can You tell,
Who in our Father dwell.

Catechesis Warm-Up Songs, Part 2

Part 2 of this youth catechesis hymn project coincides with the second chief part of Luther's Small Catechism: the Creed, broken up into three articles. So here's my stab at a warm-up song for each unit in that series of lessons. Art: An illuminated, 14th century Bible manuscript depicting the attibuton of the Apostles' Creed to the Twelve, public domain.

569. The Father and Creation (1st Article)
Tune: ZEUCH MEINEN GEIST, a.k.a. ST. GREGORY, J. B. König’s Choralbuch, 1738
(cf. "O God of Love, O King of Peace" in Common Service Book and Service Book and Hymnal; also "Great God! we sing that mighty Hand" in CSB)

In God the Father I believe:
The God who has created me
And all things, from Whom I receive
All that I need, abundantly.

My soul and body, mind and heart
Are His to give and to preserve;
Rich daily gifts does He impart,
Regardless of what I deserve.

My flesh from danger does He shield,
My soul from evil saves and wards:
All thanks and praise to God I yield
For all His Father-love affords.

570. The Son and Redemption (2nd Article)
Tune: HERRNHUT by Bartholomäus Gesius, †1613
(cf. "Jesus, Thy blood and righteousness" in SBH, Lutheran Hymnary and Ev. Lutheran Hymnary)

I trust in God's eternal Son,
True God, true Man by Mary's womb,
Who on the cross redemption won
And rose victorious from the tomb.

I have been purchased, not with gold
Or silver, but with priceless blood,
When Jesus into death was sold,
My evil covering with good.

So I rejoice to be His own
And offer Him my everything,
Here and before His glorious throne—
My slain and ever living King!

571. The Spirit and the Church (3rd Article)
Tune: RATISBON, Leipzig, 1815
(cf. "Christ, whose glory fills the skies")

Not by reason, nor by will,
Nor by sentimental thrill,
Nor from any power in me
Came the faith that set me free;
But the Holy Spirit's light
Turned my blindness into sight.

You and I, believers all,
Owe it to the Spirit's call,
Gath'ring us around the Word
That plants faith where it is heard,
With baptism and sacrament
Working Jesus' kind intent.

Those now to salvation wise
God the Spirit sanctifies,
Giving everything we lack,
Proofing us from each attack
Of the world, our flesh, our foe,
Till He bids us heav'nward go.

Catechesis Warm-Up Songs, Part 1

I've had a new brainwave for a series of hymns, to set me up for another section of the upcoming book, Profitable Hymns. I'd like to think of them as warm-up songs for a youth catechism class, with each piece designed to be brief, simple, straight-to-the-point and (hopefully) catchy, if I can come up with appropriate tunes to go with them. To start, here are some ditties to open lessons on each of the Ten Commandments (adding them as I write them), as explained in Luther's Small Catechism. Note: If you're going to have a problem with how I number the Ten Commandments, take it up with Martin Luther. A second note: the numbering of the songs is only meant to maintain the continuity of the numbering (from zero) of the original hymns as I've posted them on this blog.

558. No Other God (1st Commandment)
Tune: YOU ONLY by yours truly, just now

You only, God, You only
Are the true and living Lord,
All worthy, yea, all worthy
To be worshiped and adored.

You rightly, God, are jealous
Of the race You raised from dust:
So help us, God, be zealous
In Your fear and love and trust.

559. God's Holy Name (2nd Commandment)
Tune: WALDER by Johann J. Walder, 1788
(cf. "How precious is the Book divine")

We thank You, Lord, for every gift
Pledged in Your holy name.
Help us with fear and love to lift
It up, Your word proclaim.

Hold back the tongue that would profane
Your word with craven lies,
That pries in mystery's domain
And Your plain truth denies.

Hold back the idle tongue, that we
May not call out in vain,
But glorify Your majesty
And all we ask, obtain.

560. The Lord's Day (3rd Commandment)
Tune: POSTDAM by J.S. Bach, †1750
(cf. "'Tis good, Lord, to be here")

Dear God, You chose the hour
To shoulder all our strife:
We hear You speak with saving power
That turns our death to life.

Oh, where is such a word,
For sinners such a rest?
Grant that Your holy day, O Lord,
May unto us be blest!

Help us to count this time
No longer ours but Yours,
Devoted to the grace sublime
That from Christ Jesus pours.

561. Honoring Your Parents (4th Commandment)
Tune: PAA SIT KORS by Hartnack O.K. Zinck, 1801
(cf. "Zion, to thy Savior singing" in the old Lutheran Hymnary)

Father, You have placed above us
Those who care for us and love us:
So grant that we may with joy
Serve them, faithfully subjected,
And when chided or corrected,
Humble deference employ.

As at home, in church and nation,
In our studies and vocation,
May we not provoke their ire.
Help us recognize You working
Through their office, never shirking
From the duty they require.

562. Do Not Murder (5th Commandment)
Tune: FRANCONIA, German, 1720
(cf. "Within the Father's house," etc.)

God, who on Adam's clay
Your lively image stamped,
Protect his offspring, who this day
See death against us camped.

Give us a heart that burns
With love for all his seed,
And that from hate and anger turns
To serve each other's need.

Grant us the will to care
For all with life and breath,
And willingly their burden bear
Till Christ makes spoil of death.

563. Sexual Purity (6th Commandment)
Tune: LIGHT DIVINE, a.k.a. SONG 13 by Orlando Gibbons, †1625
(cf. "Holy Spirit, Light divine")

Dearest Jesus, pure and true,
Form me more and more like You:
By the Holy Spirit's fire
Cleanse me of corrupt desire.

Grant, like Jacob, that I wait
For one choice and cherished mate,
Lest like Esau, my birthright
I'd exchange for brief delight.

Keep my words and dealings chaste;
Shield me from degrading taste,
For I know, dear Lord, to You
Undivided love is due.

564. Do Not Steal (7th Commandment)
Tune: DUNDEE, Scottish Psalter, 1615
(cf. "God moves in a mysterious way," etc.)

Providing God, with more than food
You keep all flesh alive:
Shall I, therefore, of any good
My neighbor now deprive?

No, Lord! But rather would I lift
Their hands to hold secure,
Yea, even multiply Your gift,
Resisting greed's allure.

For every trust is Yours to lend
And Yours to take away,
Till Christ steals in to make an end
Of need in that great day.

565. Testifying Truly (8th Commandment)
Tune: ANGELUS, Heilige Seelenlust, Breslau, 1657
(cf. "At even, ere the sun was set," etc.)

Faithful are You in all You say:
Guard then, O Lord, my fickle tongue,
So sharp to cut, to lead astray,
With words to do my neighbor wrong.

With You, the Word is more than fact:
Eternally begotten Son,
Uniting speech with potent act,
You ever live, with God are One.

I shall then let my yea be yea,
My no be no, my witness true,
And good things of my neighbor say
Before all men, and unto You.

566. Mind Your Desires (9th Commandment)
Tune: KOMM, O KOMM, DU GEIST DES LEBENS, Meiningen, 1693
(cf. "Come, O come, Thou quickening Spirit")

Lord, what wanting, plotting, scheming
Dwells within my selfish heart,
Which by fraud, yet upright seeming,
Seeks to grasp my neighbor's part!
Though the deed I never do,
Such desire is sin to You.

I am guilty, just as surely
As if thought won its effect.
Inwardly, yea, wholly, purely,
Your law bids me be correct.
So betraying You within,
How can I be free from sin?

Jesus, graciously forgiving,
Your desire for me is pure.
Live in me the life I'm living
And be my pollution's cure,
That my neighbor's rightful part
I may cherish in my heart.

567. Mind Your Vocation (10th Commandment)
Tune: CHRISTUS, DER IST MEIN LEBEN by Melchior Vulpius, 1609
(cf. "For me to live is Jesus")

Lord, thank You for my station
At home and everywhere,
For blessing each relation
Entrusted to my care.

Let angel hosts attend me;
Help me to deal aright.
From enviers defend me;
Subdue their guile and spite.

Let none by arts beguiling
Estrange those in my care;
Though menacing or smiling,
An evil thing they dare.

Keep me, as well, from seeking
To take my neighbor's place.
May I, when of him speaking,
His interest embrace.

Wherever I have lusted,
O God, my sin forgive!
For as You have entrusted
To each, so shall he live.

568. Summary of the Commandments (Exodus 20:5-6)
Tune: YOU ONLY (again; cf. 558)

You only, God, are worthy
Of all fear and love and trust,
Both heavenly and earthy,
Even ours, though we are dust.

You threaten to repay them
Who would answer You with hate;
You promise to array them
In Your grace, who on You wait.

Make us such heirs of blessing!
Grant to us a hearing heart,
Into Your kingdom pressing
As Your people, set apart.

ART: The tablets of The Ten Commandments, in a still from the film by that name, public domain.

557. Good Friday Exhortation

O benighted generation,
Groping, stumbling, short of sight,
Raise your heads! For now salvation,
Once for all, is brought to light.
Christ is publicly presented
As the Lamb who bears all sin:
On Him solely oriented,
Eyes of faith shall drink Him in.

All you deaf and hard of hearing,
Stammering or slow of tongue,
Raise your heads! For tidings cheering
Shall henceforth be told and sung.
Hark, your Shepherd's voice is calling
Each by name to rich repast.
Hear Him: spurn the false, enthralling
Babble of the age at last!

Lame and limping pilgrims, straying
From God's hard and narrow way,
Raise your heads! See Christ displaying
Nail-scarred feet, your debt to pay.
Freed from sin, make haste to follow
Him whose tread subdues the sea.
Turn aside from byways hollow;
Let His cross your polestar be.

All you poor, you brokenhearted,
Captives, outcast, and unclean,
Raise your heads! The veil is parted;
Now God's Mercy-Seat is seen.
Pain and woe last but a season;
Death is made a blessed sleep,
And the hope of life our reason
That a prayerful watch we keep.

ART: Andrey Mironov, free to use under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 International license.

Three Movie Reviews

Over the weekend, I saw three movies – one a little old, two brand new.

First there was the film adaptation of Andy Weir's novel Project Hail Mary, which I really enjoyed. Upon reviewing my review of the book, I see that I've been salivating over this movie since last September. Oh, cruel, cruel Hollywood, holding out on a really decent movie for so long!

So, at the risk of repeating what I said in my book review, the story is about a guy named Grace who wakes up from an induced coma with no memory whatsoever. By a combination of science and a slow drip of returning memory, he gradually works out that he's on a mission to Tau Ceti, something like 12 light years from Earth, because it's smack in the middle of a cluster of stars – including our sun – that are dying due to an interstellar plague of energy-eating microbes; and yet it (Tau Ceti) doesn't seem to be affected. He was apparently one of three astronauts sent in a ship propelled by these astrophage ("they toot, they scoot") to find out what Tau Ceti got that they ain't got and, for some reason, he's now the only one left alive. Soon after he gets to Tau Ceti, he encounters a representative of a completely non-anthropomorphic alien race who is also there for the same reason and, tragically, also the only surviving member of his crew. The fate of both their worlds depends on them figuring out what is keeping Tau Ceti peppy and how to send that home.

Rocky, the alien from 40 Eridani, is a surprise in the book but no effort was expended on keeping him a surprise for the movie. It works well for what it's billed as: a heartwarming, thought-provoking, near-future sci-fi buddy comedy featuring a lone human and a puppet (not CGI) alien. Alien who somehow conveys a distinct personality and a whole range of moods without having a face, or really almost any other recognizable characteristic of people as we know them. He eventually gets a voice, thanks to a computer subroutine that Grace programs to translate his complex language of musical tones. And the two of them develop a beautiful friendship that makes it possible for an audience to sit throughout a more than two-and-a-half-hour movie without complaining. Meanwhile, they're laughing, crying, feeling all kinds of emotions, and while the flashbacks do keep it from being altogether a one-man show, Ryan Gosling's acting as Grace deserves a lot of the credit for that.

Besides Gosling, the cast also includes academy award nominee Sandra Hüller (Zone of Interest) as the head of the Hail Mary Project, who dragoons Grace into sacrificing his future to save humanity; James Ortiz as the voice and lead puppeteer of Rocky; Ken Leung (Lost) as one of Grace's ill-fated crewmates; Lionel Boyce (The Bear) as a sympathetic security guard; and a one-line voice cameo by Meryl Streep. The screenplay is by Drew Goddard, who also wrote the screenplay for Weir's The Martian; directors are Phil Lord and Christopher Miller, directors of Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, 21 and 22 Jump Street and The Lego Movie, and writers/producers of the Spider-Verse movies. So, a quality team there! And the results are a tremendously successful movie that, for just this moment, seems to be restoring audiences' faith in the possibility of really good movies. And by really good movie, I mean one that I've already seen not once but twice, at full theater price, with no regret whatsoever.

Three Scenes that Made It For Me: (1) Rocky's first hug, awkward in so many ways, all of them just right. (2) The dangerous mission to scoop "taumoeba" out of the atmosphere of the planet Adrian (just try to guess where that name came from) and all of the thrilling and devastating ways it goes wrong. (3) Hüller's karaoke scene, which (according to an excerpt from an interview that I saw online the other night) she apparently refused to do unless the song could be Harry Styles' "Sign of the Times." In the context of the story, it was a haunting choice.

The second film of the weekend was a streaming-on-TV presentation of The Ride from 2018. It's a fictionalized biography of BMX champion John Buultjens, starring rapper Ludacris and Rizzoli & Isles alum Sasha Alexander as his adoptive parents. Very fictionalized, it turns out. You actually see the guy himself at the end of the film, and there's no way the technology used by the teenaged version of his character existed when he was that age. Apparently he's from Scotland as well, while the kid in the movie seems to be from the L.A. area. But regardless of all that, it's an emotionally stirring story about a kid brought up in an abusive, racist home who, after a spell in juvenile detention (he stabs his dad to protect his mom), gets a chance to experience a loving family ... from an interracial couple. And also, despite never having learned to ride a bike, he goes on to win a big BMX championship.

I'm not going to belabor the synopsis. The kid is troubled. He's trouble. He gets a hard start in life and, by the time his teens hit, he's a hard young man. He's slow to accept a black man as his foster (and eventually adoptive) dad. He has a tendency to get into trouble. He's a fighter – a survivor. And as his attitudes change and his goals come into focus, he faces an old threat in a new form: the skinhead gang his father belonged to, and that his older brother still belongs to.

Three Scenes That Made It For Me: (1) The young bookworm, who has never gotten on half so well with people as with books, wins over the prettiest girl in history class by giving her a hint based on his knowledge of ancient Greek heroes. (2) After some behavioral hiccups reveal his longing to learn how to do BMX bike tricks, young John accepts some help from his foster-dad. (3) The tough older brother comes to the rescue when the Aryan Brotherhood targets John and his new family.

Finally, yesterday's matinee was The Pout-Pout Fish, based on the children's book by Deborah Diesen and featuring the voices of Nick Offerman (Parks and Recreation), Miranda Otto (Eowyn from The Lord of the Rings), Jordin Sparks (2007 winner of American Idol), Amy Sedaris (BoJack Horseman), and Remy Hii (Crazy Rich Asians). Unlike Project Hail Mary, which I've been waiting to see since last September, I'd never heard of this movie until the day I saw it. It was part of the appeal, to tell the truth.

The part-American, part-Australian movie tells the story of a grumpy blue fish with a perpetual frown, who likes to keep to himself. A young sea dragon named Pip disturbs his tranquility, and after a mishap destroys both of their homes, they go on a quest to find a legendary, wish-granting fish known as Shimmer. Meanwhile, a cuttlefish whose habitat is becoming uninhabitable due to a kelp infestation, sets off to seek the same source of magical help. Their paths cross multiple times, colliding as well with dolphins, sharks, whales, jellyfish, gossipy starfish and all kinds of other denizens of the deep in a series of adventures that range from funny to thrilling to scary and a little sad. Of course everybody learns lessons and they all come together at the end to solve the problems that threaten everybody's way of life in this diverse little corner of the ocean.

I thought it was an adorable movie, with a tender heart, a sharp sense of humor and gorgeous imagery. So I'll get right to Three Scenes That Made It For Me: (1) a trio of bedazzled, but very carnivorous, dolphins menaces the hero pair. (2) The cuttlefish use their power to hypnotize all the fish on the reef in their dastardly plan to redevelop it as their own habitat. (3) Mr. Fish (I love the name) remembers why he believes in Shimmer.