My Favorite Insults

Now and then I note down a line that comes to me, crying out for a story to live in. In some cases, I can never come up with a story good enough, so I'm left with a good line dangling loose. Among these are my two favorite bitchy remarks.

Best response to a long, prolix, officialese utterance:
"Your words swarm, but they do not sting."

Best memo to a high-living writer who doesn't keep deadlines:
"Get your ars longa in here, or I'll make sure you have a vita brevis."